Effeminacy

 St. Thomas Aquinas defined effeminacy as the inability to put aside one's pleasure in pursuit of the arduous good.

That is, a shying away from doing hard things because it means giving up one's comfort.

This refers to boys who never become men because they never learn discipline, or how to deny themselves anything.

Men are meant to pour themselves out in service to others: their wives, their children, and their neighbors in need.

That continual pouring out is itself the arduous good that men are called to and which Christ, as Son of Man continually gives us by His example.

But when they can't or won't pour themselves out, when they lead lives of continual distraction and pass the time with frivolous entertainment, pornography and intoxication, they abdicate there vocation as men. And deep down, they know it

and they are miserable in their abdication."

-Daniel Kerr

https://www.newadvent.org/summa/3138.htm